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September 22nd, 2021
12:13 pm
This journal is generally friends- only...comment if you'd like to be added
Hey, I am Vanessa. This journal contains frighteningly detailed accounts of the most mundane aspects of my life. I'm going to go ahead and not apologize for anything I write, so if you know me, be careful.
( List of Characters )
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June 9th, 2009
10:45 pm
okay something sorta scary: tonight I was watching an ultimate frisbee match and ran into my delightful, albiet a little scatterbrained former advisor. I mean, my first one, when I was a psych major in school. Everytime I went to his office to get advised he would sort of squint at my sheet of classes to take and ask me the same questions over and over. This is the guy who advised me to take honors calc! HA! I also had this guy for child/adolescent classes and he was awesome. I decided that if he weren't married I would take him. But he is! Well anyhow I ran into him again last summer playing frisbee and now though I don't covet him at all I call him "Dr. Doug." Sometimes I mess up and call him "Dr. Dogg." I digress. I saw him tonight and thought, well he used to be my advisor. So I walked right up to him and asked him about getting a master's. That's right. Graduate School.
I've been in this transitive process where I thought moving was the best solution to my doldrums, then I thought that sitting still would somehow do it. The bottom line is though I've actually been reinvigoratied about my current job (same one as the past 3 years) it's not where I'd like to be in five years. Oh no, not at all. But here I am, doing nothing to get me anywhere closer to where I want to go. I want to help people. I want to talk to people. I want to provide service. But not in retail!! I was telling Dr. Doug about my transition to "the dark side" a.k.a. English, and he groaned and fell on the ground. Granted, he was cross-legged on the ground to begin with, but the sentiment is correct.
Here are the steps to reclaiming my former career path:
-take the GRE, make a lovely score
-apply to grad schools
-apply to a counseling program
-get accepted
-take classes
-internships, specialties, etc
-et voila
This might possibly take me SEVERAL years, depending on how this GRE business goes and applying and all that, and also working while getting the degree finished. Which, I could get an assistantship or grant or loan and quit le gallery but we'll see. I think I am okay with it taking a little while. It's the plan that has formed most quickly and logically in my mind, which tells me something. I have the rest of my life, it won't be all that bad to work on this for a while. I think it will be worth it.
Other news: planted a garden, cleaned the closet, made a swimsuit, 4 lbs until I reach my goal weight. Adam is good. Saw Natha, saw Megan, miss Sarah, miss Virginia.
Current Location: warehouse dance floor.
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August 11th, 2008
07:18 pm - updatey
Rachel found this super ugly little black and white dog a few days ago. Maybe it found her. Anyway it is truely ugly and smelly but was wearing a doggy harness so she figured someone liked it and would want it back and possibly offer a reward. She let it sleep inside and climb on the couch and everything but she'd still put it outside for periods of time hoping its owner would drive by and see it and pick it up, and I guess that's what happened because it's not around anymore. I sort of miss the ugly thing. She called it "You" but Rohde and I experimented with names and it responded the best to "Rascal" so that is what I called it. I sort of miss smelly little Rascal.
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December 11th, 2007
03:30 pm
In 2008,  ava_moline resolves to... Get back in contact with some old cats. Put fifty pianos a month into my savings account. Admit my true feelings to ramonestattoo. Give some stilletos to charity. Spend less time on whiskey. Overcome my secret fear of beardy beards.
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September 28th, 2007
September 17th, 2007
10:52 pm - hey everybody...
This is Malcom, BJ's roommate's puppy. He's bigger than this now, but not much! I'm teaching him sit and pee outside and next is down.
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June 3rd, 2007
05:10 pm
I would just like to say this picture cracks me up. Natha took a bunch the last time she was in town (a couple weeks ago) and I didn't see them until today!
( a few more )
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March 27th, 2007
01:09 pm
Recent dreams:
A few nights ago at my mother's I had a terrifying dream (well, it was terrifying at the time). I was working at a funeral home and sitting in a room with a corpse. It was a girl in a glass coffin wearing a white gown with lilies in her hands. She had very pale skin and dark ringlet hair and was also wearing either a veil or white flowers in her hair. So I was sitting there reading or doing needlework or something in a black dress when she opens her eyes and looks at me. I was startled and then she started talking to me. We started chatting about random things and laughing and having a good conversation when she told me about her fiance and about how she was sad that she couldn't be with him and that he wouldn't come in to pay his final respects. I was like, "Well, let me see if I can go find him." I left the room and found a handsome young man in a suit crying. I asked if it was his fiance who'd died and when he said yes, I said, "Oh, she's awake now, talking to me. You can go say hello!" He looked at me like I was insane and said, "She's dead." I was like, "Yeah, but she's talking to me," and he gave me this look and immediately it clicked that she was dead but undead. And I got really freaked out and realized I'd seen rotting spots on her face. But I was most freaked out that I hadn't realized she was a zombie and that normally dead people don't wake up. After I told this dream to Virginia and BJ, I realized it wasn't as scary as it'd felt. I also realized the extreme parallels between my dream and the movie Cemetery Man. Also, I think it's a recurring theme in my dreams lately that dead things are not dead...a month or so ago I dreamed I was at a funeral home and was waiting for a funeral to end. The man that was dead kept moving his hands as though he was speaking sign language and I kept asking everyone if he was really dead and they kept telling me he was. But I wasn't convinced.
After looking up the "interpretations" I thought it was telling that I spent most of that day feeling upset about my father.
White
White represents purity, perfection, peace, innocence, dignity, cleanliness, awareness, and new beginnings. You may be experiencing a reawakening or have a fresh outlook on life. However, in Eastern cultures, white is associated with death and mourning.
Coffin
To see a body in a coffin signifies that you will be going through a period of depression. You may feel confined, restricted and lack personal freedom. There may be a dead or decaying situation or issue in your life and this dream is calling attention to it. It is time to end this situation or relationship.
Funeral
To dream that you are at somebody else's funeral signifies that you are burying an old relationship and closing the lid on the past. You may be letting go some of the feelings (resentment, anger, hostility toward someone) that you've been clinging onto. If your are dreaming that you are at a funeral of an unknown person, then it suggests that something in your life is supposed to be put to rest or put aside so that you can make room for something new. You need to investigate further what aspect or component of your life you need to let go.
Lily
To see lilies in your dream symbolizes tranquility, spirituality, peace, and bliss.
****
Only two things stuck with me from last night's dream. I was in a huge lecture class and my phone kept ringing and I couldn't figure out how to turn it to 'silent' and everyone got mad at me. I am pretty sure this went along with my alarm clock. The most vivid part was going to a store that sold appliances and realizing their gimmick was having a live, "tame" lion chained up in the store. I got really mad and was like, "That's no way for a lion to live!" I am pretty sure this part came from Virginia telling me about a donkey in St. Thomas whose owner painted the donkey's hooves and lips red and made it wear huge neon sunglasses as a tourist attraction. She told me she gave its owner a talking-to about dignity, etc. She also said the donkey was ashamed of its situation and wouldn't look anyone in the eye.
Chains
To see chains in your dream signifies your need to break free from a routine, old idea, or a relationship. If you are being chained, then some part of you is being forcefully held in check.
Lions
To see a lion in your dream symbolizes great strength, aggression, and power. You will overcome your emotions and/or difficulties. As king of the jungle, the lion also represents royalty, leadership, pride and dominion. You have much influence over others. You may also need to exercise restraint in your own personal and social life.
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February 28th, 2007
February 6th, 2007
10:18 am
it's supposed to be 60 degrees today! wear a dress!!
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January 8th, 2007
10:36 pm - another haircut
Ed before
Ed with Ramey hair
after
( messy room )
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January 7th, 2007
08:36 pm
This has probably been the best Sunday in a while. It was not rainy or awful out and I got to sleep in, then I cut Ed's hair while listening to old country-western albums. After that I went to the store with Virginia and searched in vain for a swiffer carpet flick, because ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) vawawwee keeps proclaiming its merits, but unfortunately Wal*Mart was still out of them. I did, however, purchase frames for the gigantic prints I made of Nick and Melanie over the summer so I can finally put them up. I arranged V's jewelry wall so maybe she will stop stealing my necklaces, ha.
Sarah and I made plans to go to the drag show tonight but I think she's sick. Hmm.
Current Music: "rock you like a hurricane" --scorpions
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December 16th, 2006
December 6th, 2006
08:04 pm - stolen picture from amy's journal
alison scoops the best ice cream
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December 1st, 2006
11:18 am - conditions
blue sky
the courtyard
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November 1st, 2006
October 30th, 2006
06:00 pm
I've been a busy bee. At work I rearranged everything:
-Saturday I changed the mannequins and redid the jewelry in the window, then today I carefully folded every single scarf and put them on the window ledge.
-also on Saturday I set all the boe jewelry on the floor and put the brown/ amber jewelry on one of the small tables by the window
-well, I just rearranged everything. I got sick of it.
I am so stressed. A beer! I need a beer!
I'm wearing an wool sweater and it itches.
I got to see Barry Manilow sing twice today on television, on good morning america and on ellen (I was not watching either of these shows, they were just on). Apparently he has a new album out, an album of sixties covers. This reminds me...last week at jr's derek and I saw this guy singing on television. we couldn't hear it and the captions were off so we were trying to guess who it was.
I thought it was rod stewart and derek said pffft, rod stewart?! it's not rod stewart.
turned out to be barry manilow
see, Derek? they look just the same.
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October 2nd, 2006
07:32 pm
Me and sarah being mallrats
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September 19th, 2006
September 16th, 2006
06:40 pm
hey you know that song
"When I wake up, well I know I'm gonna be,
I'm gonna be the man who wakes up next to you (ETC)
But I would walk 500 miles
And I would walk 500 more
Just to be the man who walks a thousand miles
To fall down at your door
fa la la! (fa la la!)
fa la la! (fa la la!)
Da Da Da Dun Diddle Un Diddle Un Diddle Uh Da Da"?
When we were little, my brother and I used to think they were saying "Vanessa!" instead of "fa la la!" We discovered our mutual misunderstanding of the lyrics when I was like 17. pretty weird, huh?
Current Music: the proclaimers
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